The average heart rate of a domestic dog may be anywhere from 60 to 220 beats per minute depending on its age, size, and state of arousal. For example an adult dog will have a slower heart rate than a puppy and the heart of a dog at rest beats slower than the heart of a dog that is nervous, startled, or running fast. The dog with the fastest horizontal land speed is the greyhound which can sprint at up to 45 miles per hour although most pet dogs have a far lower velocity. Enterprising breeders across history have engineered many different types of dogs each with distinct names, shapes, and vital statistics. In my 28 years on this Earth I have enjoyed: Dalmatian. Alsatian. Cocker Spaniel. Siberian Husky. Miniature Schnauzer. Shar pei. Shih-Tzu. Poodle: Standard. Poodle: Toy. Dachshund, Pit Bull Terrier, Golden Retriever, Chocolate Labrador, English Bulldog among others.

The internet is an Exciting new way to connect with other people and make friends. My house is connected to the internet, so that I can meet people and learn about their lives and movements. I can currently be found on petforums.co.uk, dogforum.co.uk, facebook slash dog breeder forum, reddit slash r slash furry vore until I realised I had made a fundamental misunderstanding, champdogs.co.uk, and doomsdayprepperkitchen.com. My username, also known as an online handle is dog_enjoyer. Some people have said that I should pick a different handle, jealous people such as dogenjoyer1001, d0genjoy3r, and doug_enjoyer who have said that the way I enjoy dogs is the wrong way however I once saw a comic where a man said to ‘let people enjoy things’ and I send it to them every day so they never forget to let people enjoy things.

I have been enjoying the flavour profile of flora and fauna common in this region of the Northern Hemisphere. A coyote Viciously Bit my calf during my brief time walking through Green Lakes Shore Park where I encountered Golfers, Joggers, Professional Dogwalkers, Hippies and Recreational Campers. However the doctor said I appear to have a natural immunity to rabies and potentially other neurotropic viruses although I was not interested in staying for the doctor’s various tests, his many framed certificates did not impress me because the time that would be wasted could instead be spent thinking about flavours. A woman was yelling very loudly about her baby going missing in the park but I did not see her with a pram she had a lead which once went round the scrag end of a Yorkshire Terrier that I ate with wasabi mayonnaise in the park’s camping showers and accessible toilet.

A common ice breaker which I have heard about is What Do You Do For A Living, I Am Glad You Asked. What do I do for a living? I am glad you asked – I work as a data analyst and data handler for a multi-industry company, also known as a conglomerate. They do not need any data because they are large and full of data analysts and data handlers, but the businesses that they own are smaller and in need of things like this. I plot data such as sales and losses against real world factors that may impact the financial well-being of companies for example an owner of a plane company may see in the news that there are plane disasters and see it as his own disaster because people will be too scared to buy tickets for a ride on his several planes. This job has taken me to many glamorous destinations like Marseilles, Glasgow, Manchester, Rotterdam, Munich, Port among others, but it is not all fun and games, here is an example of a time that was not fun or games, I inadvertently left my laptop screen unlocked while I was getting lunch and my supervisor saw that I had a non work related tab open which contained one of my own personal spreadsheets where I was tracking strings of domestic animal disappearances in Marseilles, Glasgow, Manchester, Rotterdam, Munich, Port among others.

Be Prepared. That is the Boy Scouts marching song. I do not have a marching song because I am not the Boy Scouts I am a 28 year old man. however if I did it would also be Be Prepared because I think it is important to be prepared. My father was a boy scout and he taught me a lot of useful skills and the importance of correct tools. Here is an example: since I once got locked out of my inherited bungalow, 2 rooms, I never go anywhere without my pry-bar, flashlight, pen-knife, glass cutter, lockpicks, and pliers. Conversely when camping outdoors it is important to bring a light source, bushknife, fishing line and hooks, firestarter, and water purification tablets. We would go for hikes and expeditions in Lincolnshire so that I would grow up the right way like American hero Chris Kyle The American Sniper and not become soft like my mother God rest her soul. One day we were in the woods where I saw Horse Mushroom, The Prince, Yellow Stainer, Swan’s-neck Thyme Moss, and my father slip and fall down a natural fissure.

Dalmatian (KETCHUP). German Shepherd (CURRY SAUCE). Cocker Spaniel (MAYONNAISE). Siberian Husky (SWEET BABY RAY’S GOURMET SAUCE). Miniature Schnauzer (DIJON). Shar pei (TERIYAKI). Shih-Tzu (SRIRACHA). Poodle: Standard (HOLLANDAISE). Poodle: Toy (HOLLANDAISE). Dachshund (SALT), Pit Bull Terrier (CHINESE BLACK VINEGAR), Golden Retriever (THOUSAND ISLAND), Chocolate Labrador (COOL WHIP), English Bulldog (GRAVY). Police. Seeing Eye. Emotional Support. Bomb detecting. Drug detecting. Boston Dynamics – prototype. Boston Dynamics – decommissioned. University Mascot. Influencer. Homophobic. Convicted Murderer. Puppygirl. Air Bud. Clifford. Big Structural Bailey. Scrappy Doo. The 75 Dachshunds of William Randolph Hearst. Quiche Lorraine.

A persistent coworker of mine on the 2021 Qiui Cellmate 2.0 Wifi-Enabled Chastity Cage Emergency Product Recall Project once saw my condiments rucksack and one day later forwarded me a compelling online article called The Top Ten Seriously Fancy World Famous Meals To Eat Before You Die. I believe that I can outperform the author of this article and come up with One Famous Meal To Eat that is famous and satisfying enough that I would make peace with my death, something my father told me all men must do 3 weeks before he slipped and fell down a natural fissure and 3 weeks 2 days before he joined my mother in heaven. Today I only need one condiment in my rucksack which is Stadium Mustard in a streamlined squeeze bottle that leaves plenty of room for my pry-bar, flashlight, pen-knife, glass cutter, lockpicks, and pliers.

“America is a divided country” is a thing that people have been saying to me a lot in my travels. On the White House Lawn, I met a Nice Lady called Susan who was Overly Concerned with the welfare of laboratory beasts. She told me she goes to a lot of protests including mask mandates, gender ideology and storming the nations capital. She asked me what I thought of the conditions that amoral scientists keep laboratory beagles in and I told her that I thought battery farming ruins the flavours and flavours are very important to me.
The sides of her mouth turned down and she spoke fast and loud like my father did shortly after slipping and falling down a natural fissure and asked what I meant and why I had come to her protest if I was going to say such nonsense and I said I wasn’t here to protest I was here because my internet pen-pal the White House Assistant Dog Coroner sent me something that he called a “hot lead” – Joe Biden The Commander In Chief Of The United States Of America’s rambunctious dog Major is due to be destroyed for biting crimes against mens legs and I would like to enjoy Major ideally before cremation or taxidermy. Susan the Nice Lady With Opinions on Animals said “You are crazy dog enjoyer, the secret service men will get you like they got my beloved son Michael on The 6th of January 2021” And I told her thank you for your concern Susan but this is One Seriously Fancy World Famous Meal I Must Eat Before I Die.

DALMATIAN - ALSATIAN - COCKER SPANIEL - SIBERIAN HUSKY - MINIATURE SCHNAUZER - SHAR PEI - SHIH-TZU - POODLE - DACHSHUND - PIT BULL TERRIER - GOLDEN RETRIEVER - CHOCOLATE LABRADOR - ENGLISH BULLDOG - GOLFERS - JOGGERS - PROFESSIONAL DOGWALKERS - HIPPIES - RECREATIONAL CAMPERS - MARSEILLES - GLASGOW - MANCHESTER - ROTTERDAM - MUNICH - PORT - PRY-BAR - FLASHLIGHT - PEN KNIFE - GLASS CUTTER - LOCKPICKS - PLIERS - BUSH KNIFE - FISHING LINE - FIRESTARTER - WATER PURIFICATION TABLETS - HORSE MUSHROOM - THE PRINCE - YELLOW STAINER - SWANS NECK THYME MOSS – ELON MUSK – GRANDMASTER FLASH - KETCHUP - CURRY SAUCE - MAYONNAISE - SWEET BABY RAYS GOURMET SAUCE - DIJON - TERIYAKI - SRIRACHA - HOLLANDAISE - SALT - CHINESE BLACK VINEGAR - THOUSAND ISLAND - COOL WHIP - GRAVY - STADIUM MUSTARD – STADIUM MUSTARD – STADIUM MUSTARD – STADIUM MUSTARD